Monday, November 03, 2003
It was a long and fantastic weekend (yet not long enough, and not fantastic enough). (I don't know exactly what that means, except that it left me wanting...more).
I went to a great Halloween party in Virginia, where I met lots of fun people. Once again, a good time was had by all, and there are pictures out there somewhere. The bunny costume was a success, although the tail kept on falling off. Saturday Peter and I went hiking at Sugarloaf "Mountain" and then made dinner and watched Signs (with Mel Gibson). It really is about aliens -- who knew?
All of this brings me to thoughts on next weekend. The aforementioned Deep Fried Turkey festivities are happening in Charlotte, NC, and several of the people who I met in Ireland two years ago are going to be there. I would love to hang out with them, and this is the first time I've been close enough to drive to something like this.
On the other hand, there are several things happening here in DC that I would like to do this weekend -- hang out with roommates, go on a hay ride with some kids I know, try out a new Bible study (more on that later). There are definite pluses to both things, but I feel like I'm choosing between my past and my future.
There is an intentionality in moving that acknowledges that your life will be different in the new place. You won't do the same things all the time, or hang out with the same people. It doesn't mean that you will lose all the friends in the place you moved from, but it does mean your relationships will change. There's no way to get around 5, or 100 or 3,000 miles. And you can still spend your time and energy on friends in the old place, but you won't build friends like that in the new place if you don't put some time and energy there, too. Maybe this is all too simplistic, but I feel like I have to remind myself of it all the time. It's so frustrating not to have my good friends close.
I don't want anyone here to replace them, I want them here.
However, stating that, and wanting that, does not make it so, and I have to figure out what to do in the meantime. And I'm guessing that the answer includes putting some time and energy into friendships here. It's so frustrating to have to explain myself over and over again. I miss having people around who know my stories, and who know how to read me. Both of those things just take time, and shared experiences.
Each of my options next weekend are good ones, but I think I'll probably stay here. It's not as dramatic as my past and my future really, but it's weird to think about friendships in such definite and intentional terms. I'm very concious that I'm choosing for one set of friendships but against another one. That's sort of a great problem to have, because I have two options I like instead of two I don't like.
I went to a great Halloween party in Virginia, where I met lots of fun people. Once again, a good time was had by all, and there are pictures out there somewhere. The bunny costume was a success, although the tail kept on falling off. Saturday Peter and I went hiking at Sugarloaf "Mountain" and then made dinner and watched Signs (with Mel Gibson). It really is about aliens -- who knew?
All of this brings me to thoughts on next weekend. The aforementioned Deep Fried Turkey festivities are happening in Charlotte, NC, and several of the people who I met in Ireland two years ago are going to be there. I would love to hang out with them, and this is the first time I've been close enough to drive to something like this.
On the other hand, there are several things happening here in DC that I would like to do this weekend -- hang out with roommates, go on a hay ride with some kids I know, try out a new Bible study (more on that later). There are definite pluses to both things, but I feel like I'm choosing between my past and my future.
There is an intentionality in moving that acknowledges that your life will be different in the new place. You won't do the same things all the time, or hang out with the same people. It doesn't mean that you will lose all the friends in the place you moved from, but it does mean your relationships will change. There's no way to get around 5, or 100 or 3,000 miles. And you can still spend your time and energy on friends in the old place, but you won't build friends like that in the new place if you don't put some time and energy there, too. Maybe this is all too simplistic, but I feel like I have to remind myself of it all the time. It's so frustrating not to have my good friends close.
I don't want anyone here to replace them, I want them here.
However, stating that, and wanting that, does not make it so, and I have to figure out what to do in the meantime. And I'm guessing that the answer includes putting some time and energy into friendships here. It's so frustrating to have to explain myself over and over again. I miss having people around who know my stories, and who know how to read me. Both of those things just take time, and shared experiences.
Each of my options next weekend are good ones, but I think I'll probably stay here. It's not as dramatic as my past and my future really, but it's weird to think about friendships in such definite and intentional terms. I'm very concious that I'm choosing for one set of friendships but against another one. That's sort of a great problem to have, because I have two options I like instead of two I don't like.
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